Delayed terrible twos @ 3 yrs of age? | Autism PDD
Does this make sense to anyone? My DD's (3 years old) evaluations
roughly place her 1.25+ years behind in general (fine motor, cognitive,
emotional, etc). In the last month and a half she's made great gains -
talking in two, three, sometime four word sentences, understands
emotions more, etc. I'm happy of course, but I feel like I'm going through
the terrible 2s with her now - at three...Now she says "No!" to just about
everything...(I'm secretly happy she says No though)..
I was wondering if anyone has experienced this as their child went
through a period of development...And should I "discipline" her as a two
year old then? I must admit until she spoke we did just about anything to
avoid a tantrum so she was indulged.
Thanks
Angela 
Oh some developmentally typical kids are worse at three as well!
But the "no's" sounds definitely twoish.
No advice on the discipline -- I am all for trying a variety of approaches to see what works for the individual kid!
When people ask me if the terrible twos were bad, I always tell them, "Yes, but 3 was worse"! Hang in there. It does get better.
THis seems typical across the board. My non-asd kid was at his worst in his threes, but his worst was mild compared to the girls. For my ASD kids, birth to three and a half was horrible, then it got a little better.Here too, Nicky was terrible around 3.5 -4
Hang in there
John
I think the "terrible twos" are a myth - threes were much worse for both of my boys!
That was truly the year from hell here, as the entire year that the boys were three my dh had 3 knee surguries and spent the ENTIRE YEAR on crutches!
Hang in there, it gets better!!!
I wonder if that myth has stuck just because of it's alliterative appeal...I also think that 3 is a more challenging age.Also, don't forget--most developmental leaps come with some behavioral
difficulties.
Jasper had a bright red T shirt with just one word printed on it: NO. It got
laughs wherever we went.
I definitely think "terrible twos" is an alliterative thing invented by someone who doesn't have kids!Thanks you guys...I think I'd have to agree with your comment about the
alliteration, Fred...well, even though it's hard to hear, I guess year 3 will be a
battle of the wills for us...
Thanks again, Angela
PS Any parenting suggestions...and do they apply to language-delayed
children as so many parenting techniques focus on language skills...
My 7 yr old Son is relativly NT with ADHD
He was an angel at 2 a nightmare at 3...It could be the alliterative thing, but it had to originate with two-year-olds at some point, otherwise it would never have ringed true enough to stick.
I think it just refers to a particular stage of toddler development where they are beginning to reach out, explore their environment, and test their boundaries. It is most typical at age 2, hence the slogan, but it in many kids it can be advanced into age 1 or delayed into ages 3 or 4. Despite the average target of age 2, on an individual basis it just comes down to when the individual child's mind reaches that particular stage of development, and how quickly the child advances beyond it.
In a similar sense, teenagers vary in when they hit the typical "adolescent" struggles. Some of them do it in their early teens while others do it in their late teens. And some take longer to grow out of it than others. Big variance on an individual basis. But it all averages out to where the phrase "teenage years" is clearly understood to refer to parent/adolescent struggles.
struggles had to do with just a clash of egos...I guess I'm recovering from
just seeing my "child who is autistic" to my "child with normal kid
challenges" too...
Angela
i totally feel that we are living the terrible two's and he is 39 months! it is frustrating as anything. he is impossible at times. between him and the 20 month old there are days when i want to go into time out :)
as for discipline...ignoring the tantrums or removing the child from the situation is probably what needs to be done. easier said then done, especially when dealing with "meltdowns". however they just get worse and then they start the tantrum all the time for anything. we have been sending mixed messages about this, sometimes ignoring him, sometimes giving in. i know when we start ABA the therapist will tell us that consistency is important and not to give in!
either way it seems from the amount of posts, you are not alone!
L
Three was definitely worse for my NT boys, and Jason will be three next month. He's getting worse, though his worse is many orders higher "worse"!
I used to say, "Terrible twos? It's the throttle'em threes!!"
At two, she was an angel-- real easy to deal with. In a way, I miss that age.
Sarah's was an angel at 1 & 2 it was 3 that brought the tantrums..I remember her very first one was at Barnes and Noble because she didnt' want to leave...I was so giddy she was actually wanting something that I must of looked like a bafoon with a big ass grin on my face
I got over it after about 100 of these to follow ! I agree with everyone else. Two was easy, three and four are bad - this
goes for my asd ds and my NT dds. My sister-in-law said she will not
have any more kids because she can not deal with the 3 and 4 stage
again. My childcare provider friend considers 3 and 5 the worst. Just
repeat daily 'this too shall pass'
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